Dubai

It's a crazy place, massive skyscrapers penetrating the ozone, yachts, super cars and fancy hotels and restaurants. It's always too hot to walk outside and trying to surf at the beach there is torture, 36 degree water saltier than a whales urine, warmer too, and with an outside temp of about 40, the fact that there are no showers to wash off in on the beach is the icing on the melted cake.

But surfing isn't all Dubai is known for, it's not actually known for surfing, and rightly so. No, instead Dubai offers indoor snowboarding, which was a joll, sketchy but fun. It also offers dune driving, falcon racing and massive candy stores, I believe the biggest in the world, which is where I was finally in my element. It also has a wavepool, which is in the video above, but I don't want to talk about that.

Nope, I want to talk about the Dubai just around the corner, just far enough around that tourists can't see it. It's where we got shown around on the last day of the trip, it's where the locals that took us said we would experience the real Dubai... It's where we had supper.

That might not sound facinating, but it definately was an experience. Getting to the building was cool, but in the building, heading to the place was epic. It was straight out of a horror movie. Dark, plain, broken, big (like 30 floors), and that creepy silince. There was a lone elevator sitting quietly in the middle, with one of many stair-cases off to the side, the type of stair-case that you could see dead bodies, cocaine addicts and passed out bums. We opted for the elevator, not out of choice, because I didn't want to get in a small box with a murderer, but out of necessity. We were going quite high up, I'm not sure what number floor, because it was too dark but not all of us could fit at once. The local guys went up first with the girls, and one promised to return for me and Kelly. Fortunately he did and we went up. Approaching the door I thought I was in a movie, one of those movies where there's a seedy passage leading to a dark door where drug addicts and mob bosses would be waiting. There was even a tiny camera outside so that they could see who was coming.
They let us in because we were with locals, it's a locals only place. Which meant once we were sitting in the room they gave us, literally a room, with a table and a fan in the corner, the other people that were there were very interested in us, a couple South Africans. A group of strangers invited themselves in, they even brought their own chairs and closed the door. I thought they could have left it open. I don't normally drink but when drinks arrived I wasn't going to refuse, not out of politeness, but out of the need to get drunk enough to not worry about anything. I thought the Dubai version of swat was going to bust down the door at any minute.
And when food came, it came in a bowl, a bowl that spun around the table allowing everyone to eat whatever it was that we were eating. Literally there was octopus, there was intestine, I swear this one substance was brain. Whenever something that looked like chicken would come around I would be relieved, and try take a big piece. But anyway, the night wore on, no-one died, no drug mobs came in, and once the alcohol kicked in I had a really good time. I think I did anyway, it's a bit blurry, I remember laughter. I think I fell asleep in the taxi, but my excuse is that it was about 5am. Just enough time to sleep for an hour and then catch a flight back home, with probably the most activity filled 3 days of my life under the belt.

What an epic place.